05.27.09
May 27, 2008…The Beginning of Us
Exactly one year ago today he came into my life and I have never been the same.
The day started all wrong…I woke up late, couldn’t figure out what to wear and could not for the life of me find the damn letter I needed to get into my appointment. With the letter roughly shoved into my purse and my mental checklist complete I ran out the door to face the day. Work was crazy as always and it did not help that I was leaving early today. I worked like a crazed woman returning calls quickly and fielding questions left and right.
At 1:55 pm, I ran out the door begging the traffic gods to please, please let me get there on time! I made in about 12 minutes leaving a trail of red lights behind and throwing out an apologetic smile or two when needed. I found parking as close as possible, threw my cell phone under my seat and walked to the building ready to get this interview over with. I get in the security line and find myself behind this obnoxious lady who refuses to take her shoes off. At my best, I am not very patient-at my worst I can be a downright bitch. This lady? She got me at my worst.
With the minutes inching closer to my appointment time, I threw all politeness out the window and basically told her to get the F**k out of my way. Some of us are actually willing to take our shoes off in the name of national security! As soon as I cleared the security gate, I literally ran up the stairs, turned my appointment letter into the appropriate window and sat to wait my turn. I had not even been waiting for five minutes when he opened the door and called my name.
“Good Afternoon, how are you” he said in that wonderfully polite tone of his-“Oh Thank God you speak English!” was my brilliant response. I quickly explained that all the other people I had dealt with spoke little to no English and I had made a bet with my coworkers that it would be just my luck to get an interviewer who did not speak English. (Trust me that was the best bet I ever lost!!). As cliché as it may sound-he captivated me from the moment we met. I sat in his office taking in the pictures on his bookcase, the awards on his walls all the while wanting to know more about him. I don’t do too well with being questioned so when he started the actual interview….well things didn’t go so well for me. See, I’ve been lucky enough to have smiled my way out of plenty of things in my life. It’s amazing what a flirty glance and a coy smile can achieve—that was not the case with him at all. And as much as it irritated me-it intrigued me just the same. Those forty five minutes I spent with him went by in flash. We chatted like old friends and I swear I could have sat there for hours talking to him. As I walked out of the building, I wasn’t sure when I would see him again…all I knew is that I would.
05.15.09
Hmmm…
IF MAY 15 IS YOUR BIRTHDAY: You have some important choices to make in the year ahead. Right now your dreams of the future are tempered by common sense. But as the summer unfolds you may feel that you are helpless to fight circumstances beyond your control. By sticking to your responsibilities and remaining focused on “doing the right thing” you will come out wiser and stronger. It is important to remember this during July, August, and September when you may experience misunderstandings with loved ones or desire to make an unwise change. Wait until October when the stars will be on your side to make a successful change in your life.
Wonder how this will pay out? Only time will tell…
05.14.09
Early Start
Last night I got to start the birthday celebration a little early!! It was just me, a cool dvd, a tall drink and a little box of lovely chocolate cupcakes from here: http://karascupcakes.com/
Happy Early Birthday To Me!!!!
05.07.09
Can I run away?
“You can’t run away from your problems you know?”
Yes, I do know that but I can wish can’t I? I can wish and dream about putting my daughter in the car, packing the things that mean the most to us and running far, far away. I dream about the place we would move to, the new people we would meet, the new school she would go to and the new career path I would take. I dream about leaving all that I know behind and starting over fresh somewhere.
I’m done with my life here. I have been here all my life and realistically am tied to this place for the next ten years. It would be cruel of me to pull her away from the life she knows and loves simply to fulfill my own desires. I shield her as much as I can from all the turbulence and craziness in our life. She doesn’t know any better-as far as he is concerned, everything is just fine. That’s all I want her to know for now—that things are fine.
I’ve been doing a good job lately of keeping it together and moving forward. I’m determined to not spiral into a depression or to get so overwhelmed that I can barely function. Other than writing here I am not talking about this or trying to analyze it. It is what it is.
05.03.09
Soulmate
So Im driving down 880 to work last week when I heard this song for the first time. I love the lyrics…I guess Im at a moment in time where they just really speak to me. I was going to put the video here but youtube is being dumb & wont let me embed the video so Im posting the lyrics instead.
Soulmate by Natasha Bedingfield
Incompatible, it don’t matter though
‘cos someone’s bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do
You’re not easy to find
Is it possible Mr. Loveable
Is already in my life?
Right in front of me
Or maybe you’re in disguise
Who doesn’t long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I’m on my own
If there’s a soulmate for everyone
Here we are again, circles never end
How do I find the perfect fit
There’s enough for everyone
But I’m still waiting in line
Who doesn’t long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I’m on my own
If there’s a soulmate for everyone
If there’s a soulmate for everyone
Most relationships seem so transitory
They’re all good but not the permanent one
Who doesn’t long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I’m on my own
If there’s a soulmate for everyone
Who doesn’t long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I’m on my own
If there’s a soulmate for everyone
If there’s a soulmate for everyone
05.01.09
Made it to May
I woke up this morning SO glad that I made it to May in one piece. April was insane!!! Every single weekend I had some event, responsibility or obligation to tend to. I celebrated my Grandma’s birthday, Easter, my daughter’s birthday, my brother’s birthday and of course my daughter’s First Communion.
You have no idea how happy I am to have the whole First Communion thing behind me. We had to put this book together with all her notes from Mass and of course being the procrastinator that I am we did it at the last minute–I would have been happy with just a good job sticker or whatever but somehow she managed to get a second place ribbon for the damn thing! If our her work was second place material I can just imagine what the rest of the books looked like. Of course, you know this being a Catholic thing one project just won’t do–our next assignment: A communion banner. My limited talents were about to be put to the test with this project-I bought all the materials and what I thought would be my secret weapon: a hot glue gun! I can not sew to save my life so I figured I would just glue everything. Lucky for me, my mom and aunt would have none of that and ended up doing the project themselves with a little art direction from Belle. I must admit the damn thing turned out really nice. The Communion itself was very nice and of course my daughter looked like an angel (or a mini bride…which was a little creepy). See?

Her birthday party was very fun-15 kids at a Cooking Academy. They made personal pizzas and decorated cupcakes. The people there were great with the kids and they all had a blast. I was just happy that all I had to do was show up and pay for it! I don’t really have any good pictures to share of that since I was busy stopping the boys from using their kitchen utensils as swords.
This month I am looking forward to the Annual Mother’s Day Walk that I have been doing for the last six years and of course-my birthday! Let’s hope this month is not as insane as last.